Bucket List

It's been a long summer, and I will update on my comings and goings shortly.

However, I have been thinking about creating a Bucket List, and here it is in its beginning stages. Some are simple enough things that I just haven't done, and some are more hard core. Some will take nerve. Any suggestions/comments?

Kat's Bucket List:

1. Outdoor rock climbing
2. White water kayaking
3. Hike the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu
4. Spend at least a month in S.E. Asia
5. Rio for Carnaval
6. Live on the West Coast for a bit
7. African Safari
8. Learn to surf


That's all I have for now.

The end of online dating?

6 more days of summer school! I'm super psyched. I haven't really minded it (awesome paychecks), but it will be nice to have a few weeks of nothing to do. And I REALLY excited about our vacation road trip. Like, really really excited.

Over the past couple weeks, I have been rightly celebrating summer by going out and having lots of happy hours, but I've been going to the gym and trying to eat pretty well at the same time to balance it all out. So far, so good. My goal for the next couple weeks is to start running more (again) and find my way back to yoga. I ran on Sunday, which is a good start!

I'm working 2 more shifts at Dock St - a double this Saturday and a lunch shift next Saturday. The extra money is awesome - but I'm excited to have all of my time back. I'll still be around for people to call me if they need someone to cover their shift, but I won't be on the schedule anymore.

So about this online dating thing. I think it's over between the two of us. I have a pretty full social calendar. I've joined a few meet up groups, I've started taking dance classes and going out dancing again - so I'm around some different people and have the opportunity to meet some different people. I'm tired of first dates and meeting people that I don't have much chemistry with. It's been fun - and a great experiment - and maybe in a few months, I'll join match.com again (by far my favorite out of the three, by the way), but for now - I'm going to hide my okcupid profile and just take it easy. There is one guy that I went out with a couple weeks again that I'm going to go on a second date with, but other than that - I'm going to not meet anyone new for awhile.

This guy I met at Nodding Head, where we had dinner and a couple beers. It was nice - he's funny. He has been texting me randomly, which is nice. We were going to meet up on Saturday, but he ended up going out with some friends for his birthday. I think we may have dinner on Friday. I will let you know how it goes.

Fourth of July

I had a wonderful time this weekend! I worked Friday night and Saturday lunch and made a bunch of money, which was awesome. Ingela came (finally!) to Philly on Saturday afternoon and stayed until Sunday evening. We did quite a bit when she was here!

Saturday, as soon as she got here, we went to Northern Libs and caught part of the Matt and Kim concert. Kim is by far the happiest and most excited person that I have ever seen in my life. I would be interested to see how she is in her daily life. I can imagine her jumping in and out of Starbucks and bouncing around in her chair while she eats her lunch.

After the concert, we went to my favorite place: Dos Segundos. Yum: sopes and salad = delicious! Later that evening, we met up some with friends at Devil's Alley. It was an amazing night, and we got outside tables on the sidewalk since it wasn't very busy. At the very end of the night, Ingela and I met up with my friend Renata at this funny rooftop party at the Roosevelt. It was in the pent house ... no one lives there. Most of the people there had no idea WHY they were there. Awesome views though, lots of balconies and decks. A pretty good band played for a bit.

On Sunday, we went to the 1oth st Pourhouse (delicious and cheap!) for brunch. We then planned our AWESOME road trip, which I am super excited about. We are going to spend some time in San Fran, then go through the Napa valley, stop at a winery or two. Spend the night in Fort Bragg, going to one of the top 10 microbreweries in the country. Then, we will drive to Gold Beach in Oregon, where we will take a jet boat tour before going to Portland. Hiking, exploring the city, seeing Cannon Beach and the goonies rock will all happen before going north to Camano Island and Seattle. It's going to be a blast!

My Independence Day celebrations started after that with the Penn's Landing Icecream Festival, the Roots and Goo Goo Dolls concerts, fireworks on the Parkway, and Pete's afterwards. It was an amazing day. I had such a nice time and have some fun pictures to put up.

Yesterday, I spent some time in Rittenhouse with my sister before it got really hot, which I love. I also started SALSA classes, which I am super excited about. I miss dancing so much and am super pumped to learn actually HOW to dance. I've taken lessons here and there before and have done quite a bit of dancing in the past... enough to know the basics, but not enough to be very good. I'm pumped, especially since this means I'll go out dancing more often to practice! I miss it!

Going out with the guy from Northern Liberties again this week... on Thursday. (I shall dub him NoLibs Guy). Should be nice. We are going to go to dinner, and he mentioned going back to his apt to drink beer. Haha. Sounds perfect.

Road Trips and Fun!

Jess (sister), Ingela (best friend from high school), and I are taking a road trip next month. I am super duper excited, since we are starting to actually plan it and I am looking at all the cool things that we are going to be able to do!

We are flying into San Francisco, spending a few days there, and then driving north to Seattle. We are going to take 2 days to go from San Fran to Portland, stopping at Redwood National Park and some cool beaches, etc in Oregon. I am so excited!! We are going to spend a few days in Portland, too - which is awesome. I am going to be able to see my awesome friend Emily and spend some time with Ingela's cousin. Then, we will drive up to Seattle, spend a night or two with her family friends on some island (woo!) and then spend a night in Seattle before we fly home. I'm super pumped. Ingela is coming tomorrow and we the 3 of us are going to plan our trip!

eHarmony:
I have deleted my account on eHarmony. I went out on 4 dates with the Alfa guy. He was nice, and I had a nice time with him - but in the end, there just wasn't enough chemistry. I was disappointed, because I enjoyed spending time with him - but by the fourth date, if I am freaking out because you want to go back to your apt and I don't ---- then I'm just not that into you.
I met one other person for lunch last Friday. He is a middle school history teacher in NJ and works part time on the Spirit of Philadelphia. I had a nice time with him actually, and I texted him yesterday - but haven't heard back. Maybe he didn't like me. That's okay.

OkCupid:
I rejoined OkCupid. I figured that I since I'm trying to pay bills OFF, that paying for match.com isn't the most economical thing to do. I have met a couple people so far. I met someone on Sunday who I will most likely go out with again. We went to North Third. I had a nice time, not sure about the chemistry - but I'll have to wait and see. He lives in Northern Liberties and has a red convertible.
Last night, I met someone else. We went to Nodding Head. Dinner drug on a little longer than I would have liked - but we talked about all sorts of things, including schools, religion, work, gym. He asked me what yoga is good for (an honest question, though I got a bit defensive at first). He is not quite opinionated as me (haha), but that's probably better, haha. At the end, he said that he had a really nice time. It was a little awkward, and I think that at the end, he may have wanted to kiss me. Unless I'm sure that I like someone, I found that I do not want necessarily want to kiss them.

Then I went home and at 2 AM, I got violently ill. (I won't be eating at Nodding Head anytime soon).

Fourth of July Weekend:
I work tonight and tomorrow lunch at Dock St. (I'm trying to get my credit cards paid off, and should be able to pay off the one by September! Then, I can put all of that money into my other one! Its a lot of working, but looks like it will help me get the bills paid off pretty well!) Then Ingela is coming. I think we are going to go to dinner with a friend who also has a friend coming into town and hang out with my friend Megan. Sunday, I want to go to the ice cream festival at Penn's Landing and probably will be around the Parkway for the concerts (roots and goo goo dolls!) and fireworks. It's going to be wicked hot though. I'm not sure how long she will be sticking around, but I think that Megan and her roommate are having a party too which should be fun.

Monday, I'm going to start taking salsa classes! I'm super duper excited about that too! My environmental science class at CCP is over now, so I will have 3 extra nights per week free! Crazy. I'm going to be able to go to the gym more and have time to sit around at home (or... go out. haha).

Dates

I originally paid for a 3 month subscription to eHarmony. Combined with the fact that I decided after the first day that I didn't like it and the fact that it takes a really freakin long time sometimes to move through the "guided communication" process... I didn't spend too much time with it, and didn't end up meeting anyone from eHarmony until recently - maybe 3 weeks ago. Nice enough guy, but we didn't really click and our second date lasted exactly 2 hours on the dot.

Last week my card got charged for the 3rd month. I decided that I would give it a decent try for the last 4 weeks and see where it took me. I sifted through 191 matches (they send you a certain number each day and you are supposed to well, look at them and talk to them). I messaged guys who I had been ignoring. I closed out matches with anyone who doesn't live in Philadelphia, since I had to get through those 191 matches somehow. And so far, I've met 3 guys in the past week - the 34 year old Irish dude I already talked about (who texted me asking for another date, but I graciously declined) and two news that I met this weekend.

Here's a quick run down:

1. I met a guy for happy hour on Friday. He met me outside my apartment, and we went to Alfa. He's 26 and works in higher education. My first impression of him was that he was cute. He only had one picture on eHarmony - so it could have gone either way. We sat at a table in the back (which I was unsure of at first, I thought we could just sit at the bar - but having a table turned out nicely). We had really nice conversation and happy hour turned into 3 hour and 4 beers. It might have turned into dinner if I didn't already have plans for Megan to come over. It's better though - a too long first date takes all of the mystery out of it, and I think we all know (or well, some of us know) what can happen if I have a marathon first date and am drinking. Right. Found a reason to touch him (look at the t-shirt he was wearing under his button down) and the fact that I even WANTED to touch him was a good sign! When he walked me back, I asked him about his weekend plans, and we made plans to watch the Flyers game 2 on Monday at the Fox and the Hound - a sports bar right on the corner from my apartment. Oh, and this guy doesn't live right in the city - He lives near Bala Cynwood, but it's a hell of a lot closer than Far Away Guy.

Summary? There was chemistry, I liked him, and I am excited to see him tomorrow.

2. I met another guy at the Continental Midtown for lunch on Saturday. We sat on the roof, which was nice, but he got there 10 minutes early and just went up the roof and got a table (instead of waiting outside like most guys would). Anyway, that's fine. He proceeds to immediately tell me that he's hungover because one of his fraternity brothers was in town the night before. He told me where they went- and no wonder he was hung over, since he named like 10 places. He then told me at least 3 stories where he referred to his college fraternity days (and a couple ABOUT his college fraternity days). Throw in a story about a homeless dude with a coke and a mentioning that he likes to walk everywhere 983293 times, and you have a dud my friends.

Summary? I didn't even text him to say that it was nice to meet him. I don't think he liked me much tho either (could probably tell that I didn't like him).

Big Changes

Change #1:
I got a job!! I was offered a job at an elementary school in North Philadelphia on Saturday, but didn't take it right away. I accepted today and will sign tomorrow! Hopefully I will be teaching 3rd or 4th grade, however, I may end up in 6th. I certainly hope not though. It's actually the school that my co-teacher is going to be at next year, which will be nice! (and what are the chances of that, really?)

Change #2:
I moved! On Friday, I moved into a studio at 15th and Spruce. I absolutely love this location, and it's been relatively quiet since I moved in. I still need a bookshelf so that I can unpack the rest of my boxes, and I am planning on getting two chairs for extra seating, since right now - I just have my kitchen table and bed. I'll take some pictures soon. Jack, my cat, is a little sad. I don't think he really likes being an only cat, but he will adjust soon enough.

Other changes/updates:
Far Away Guy seems to have died out. With the distance, I think we would have to be really great for each other for it to work. I liked him, but I'm over it, and not surprised or upset. We had a nice time, and I was reminded what chemistry actually feels like. So, I've been meeting some new people from eHarmony, even though I don't like it. I met two people so far - and I haven't really had any great amount of chemistry with either one. I have been on two dates with the one who lives in South Philly, and we get along well and have had a nice time. If he asks me out again, I'll probably go to see what happens. I also met an Irish guy last night. He is a little older than guys I normally date, and I just wasn't really feeling it. He texted me about going out again, but eh. What's the point when I know I really don't like him? He totally wanted to kiss me last night, but I gave him a quick hug and kind of ran inside.

My gym routine has been sparse with the move and 3 interviews last week, and my new Environmental Science class starting last week and such. I am getting back on the wagon this week - starting with walking to and from class (about 2.5 miles round trip). I was thinking about going to the gym after class tonight (which is 6-8) to lift, but I'm not sure that will want to. I'm going to go to class in my gym clothes though just in case. I think I will go and lift just for 30 minutes or so. I ran 4 miles on Sunday which was nice.

3 years

This year, my two least favorite days fall on the same date: May 9th.

May 9th is Mother's Day this year. I am not affected my Mother's Day as was a little girl in school, where everyone made Mother's Day cards and crafts every single year. I made them too, and I gave them to my dad. From the time I was six on ... my dad WAS my mother. He cooked me dinner, sewed my clothes when they ripped, bought me pads/tampons when I got my period, took me shopping, helped out with my girl scout troop. While there were other women in my life for sure, my dad filled the mother role comfortably, and he did a pretty good job at it.

We never went to my mother's grave on Mother's Day, because it was too hard and painful for my dad. We didn't even really talk about her until I was much older - in high school or maybe even college. I am sure that a good dose of therapy would have helped me deal with things when I was younger - because if there is one thing my dad didn't teach me, it was how to deal with tough things. Luckily, he didn't chose to deal with things badly by drinking or doing any other harmful activities - he just sunk into a depression, lasting most of my adolescent and teenage years. Possibly the only thing that saved him was that I was still at home, and he had to take care of me. Instead of facing up to whatever it was that needed facing, I learned to simply pretend that everything was fine and to not actually deal with anything (something that I still struggle with today).

Despite my dad's depression and whatnot, he was an active father who spent a lot of time with me and obviously loved me immensely. He satisfied both parental roles pretty successfully and supported me in pretty much everything I wanted to do - whether he totally agreed with my decisions or not. We went on vacations. He came to every single orchestra concert I ever had. He took me to church when I decided I wanted to start going. We almost always ate dinner together, often going out to eat- because he hated to cook. He helped me look at and get my first car(s), fixing them when I was stupid, not killing me when I wrecked his. He knew my friends. He helped me pick a college, came and helped my sorority grill for Homecoming, and didn't complain or try to convince me otherwise when I decided to move to Honduras for a year.

Today marks three years since my dad died. He had a massive heart attack at work and was rushed to the hospital. I was in Honduras at the time and got a phone call from my sister when I was teaching. Immediately knowing something was wrong, and a little worried that what I feared the most was coming true, I rushed to call her back. (My dad had his first heart attack before I was born. He had many more mild ones throughout his life, and I always knew that someday he would have one that his heart couldn't handle. I was worried the most that he would die alone.) Two days later, I flew home. Two or three days after that, we disconnected him from life support. 36 hours later, he died - but he wasn't alone.

This year, Mother's Day falls on May 9th - the anniversary of my father's death. While I have dealt with his death in my own ways, true to form, I don't really talk about him or my mother that often. Blogging about it is one of the the only ways I am comfortable doing it, and it is my way of saying "Everything is NOT fine, but I am okay." And while losing someone that played such a vital role in my life can be excruciatingly hard, I know my dad would rather us celebrate the life he had, then cry over the life he lost. So instead of tears, I will celebrate by eating an ice cream sundae and watching a western. Here's to you dad.